Category Archives: Blabbing

When Art Owns My Tears #IEWU #UglyCry

IEWUWe’ve all been there.

Snot pouring from our noses. Mouths turned so low we’re worried that old wives’ tale is right and we’ll freeze that way. Tears streaming down our face, gasping for air.

The Ugly Cry.

And the after effect? Worse than the act itself.

Your face is puffy, red and you can’t even open your eyes. I don’t know about you, but even my chest hurts.

So why do we look for the things that make us cry? A sad movie… book…even a song? Whatever it is, we search for that effect and embrace it.

Like sappy, emotional masochists.

That’s what I was called yesterday when I bought the new Colleen Hoover book, It Ends With Us. A masochist.

I have no idea what it’s about, other than that’s an emotional story. All reviews of it have said so. CoHo even posted a picture of herself standing in front of a waterfall with the caption, “Standing in front of a pool of reader tears.”

I thought that was hilarious…until I realized she’ll soon own my tears!

So, as I sit here and wonder why I do this to myself, here’s a list of my top 9 Media Related Ugly Cry moments:

**warning- spoilers below!**

1- Brightside by Kim Holden. Done. The most heart-wrenching story ever. You should read it 🙂

2- Toy Story 3. If you didn’t cry as they struggled from the garbage, then you’re dead inside!

3- Grey’s Anatomy- now, mind you, I’m not a big GA fan. I started watching it when a roommate of mine was watching it on Netflix so I don’t know much about the show. But when McDreamy dies, I died. Thank God I was watching that one solo!

4- We Were Brothers- well, pretty much all war movies. But I cried from beginning to end during this one.

5- Titanic- The scene where the orchestra starts to play on the deck. Nope.

6- Lord of the Rings: Return of the King- The final scene, as Frodo sails away with Gandolf. I was by myself in the theater and sobbing as quietly as I could. It wasn’t that quite 🙂

7- Where the Red Fern Grows- Old Dan and Little Ann! *sobs*

8- The Outsiders- Stay Golden Ponyboy. RIP Johnny.

9- Harry Potter: number 5-7- This is where JK Rowling started ripping our hearts out. Sirius, Dumbledore, Dobby!? Always.

What have you read or watch that made you Ugly Cry?

Reflection Time

New Years

2015 was the year of lessons for me. I learned that putting myself out there is scary. I learned that people can be cruel without even knowing it and that the times you feel so lost and empty can be the most helpful moments. Those moments are time to reflect and to direct my life where I want it to go.

I published two works: Choking Cupid in Feb. and Playing House is Sept.  and was published in a book of poetry called Light Lines.  Overall, I’d call 2015 a successful year.

I now face 2016 with a resolve to push myself further with my writing. I already have some amazing things lined up and I’m excited to see where it all takes me.

I’ve signed up to do my first signing in May. Runaway Road’s first draft will be done no later than Jan. 11th (eek!) and I’m working on a comic book with a dear friend who just happens to be an amazing artist and designer.

A few ideas of side stories to Playing House are in the process too. 😉

**say whhhaat?!**

Goals for 2016:

  1. Make Marketing my beeyotch. I’m terrified of marketing. That was a surprise to me this past year. I’m scared of putting myself out there like I should. And that is what’s going to hurt me in the long run. It’s time for me to suck it up, grab Marketing my the shoulders and shake it until it works for me.
  2. Write EVERY DAY!!! This seems like a “duh” thing to say. But I’m terrible at it. I allow all the outside distractions keep me from being productive and that’s not going to get me anywhere.
  3. Stop comparing myself to others. This is something that needs to be practiced in my day to day life too, not just to writing. I’ve watched many indie authors publishing multiple works this past year while I sit on my one novel. I’m not them and they are not me. It doesn’t matter if they have more out. What matters is that I’m happy with my work when I’m happy with it. (BTW- I’m so proud of all of these authors! I follow and read most of their work and they are fantastic people) No matter my personal feelings, I need to remember that we all work at a different pace. We all have different lives that affect us so why am I getting mad with myself for only have one “real” book out? That’s dumb and I know this.
  4. On the other hand… I do need to be more diligent in completing works I’ve started (see #2) How else am I going to grow as a writer if I don’t write? One of the best compliments I’ve received was from my editor. She told me that she’s seen such improvement in my writing. I felt like I was 10 feet tall after that.
  5. Be happy. Another “duh” here; I need to be happier. Smile more, laugh often and just remember that life happens, stop being so hard on yourself. I’m extrememly blessed and I have accomplished some pretty kick ass things. Why stop now? Oh, I don’t plan too. But I need to remember those kick ass things when life gets me down. I think that’s something we can all agree on 🙂




Time Management- Part 1: Where does the time go?


Nobody has it. Well, at least, I don’t.

It’s strange. I’m the Monica Gellar of my family. I have an organizedunhealthy (and let’s just be honest- weird) obsession with notepads and organizer systems.  I’m in love with list making and crossing things off my to-do list gives me a high.

You can all stop judging me now.

The saddest thing, though, is that I SUCK at time management. I can make a list of a list of a list, but for the life of me, can’t find the time to finish any of them!

I always have the best intentions. The night before, I’ll make a list of everything I have to do, in order of importance. I’ll set my alarm so I can wake up early and get started. I have more calendars than I can count and all of them are filled with what I need to do.

Yet the dreaded time drains take ahold of me. Every. Single. Time.

This wouldn’t be the world’s biggest problem if it weren’t for the fact that I have A LOT to do. Between working, writing, editing, publishing, marketing, writing and grammar classes, taking care of my house, cooking, blogging and having a social life, my free time is nonexistent. Hell, I don’t even have time for myself (which is something I very, very important).

So what am I going to do about it?

I’m going to make up my own Time Management Training Program! Yes, another project. And it’s a project that’s going to eat into the time I’m trying to save. (I get the irony here) I’m also, going to be making it up as I go 🙂

Phew. I’m already feeling better. Are you having trouble finding enough time? Join me in this journey. The more the merrier!

I’ve decided that Step 1 in my Time Management training program will be:

Keep track of what you’re actually doing!

20151009_221920I realized a few years ago that when I was training for a bodybuilding competition, I had to keep a strict diet. In order to avoid temptation, I kept a food journal. I knew that if I ate something bad for me, I’d have to write it down. When I would read through my journal and see that unhealthy, terrible (but oh so delicious!) food, I’d mentally kick myself in the ass. I hated seeing that word next to the stuff I was supposed to be eating so I never ate it. It was a mental game for me.

With that being said, I have been keeping track of everything I’ve been doing and how long it takes me to do it. I’ll write down what time I wake up, when I start getting ready for the day, when I went out for dinner.

I’m even writing down when I watch T.V.  (If you haven’t seen New Girl, oh my gosh, jump on Netflix now! It’s hilarious!)

I’m hoping that this first step will show me what I spend the most time on and what I can do to make more use of my day.  I already know the main time drains in my life (Facebook, you evil monster!) which is a good thing.

Acceptance is the first step, right?

I plan on keeping this up for the next week. After that, it’ll be time to evaluate my list and see what needs to be worked on.

Do you guys have any time management tricks? I’d love to hear them!



Happy 4th of July!

I just want to take a moment to talk about how special today is.

I know things are crazy right now, with the attack in Charleston, the right to gay marriage and, well, everything else going on. But for a moment, just for today, lets forget those things. Let’s remember that this is the day to celebrate our country’s birth. A day to celebrate that we have the right to argue and to have opinions about what’s going on in our country.

It’s not about our political views. It’s not about the recent events that are starting to divide the country again. It’s about the birth of the rights we love and hold so highly.

We are very lucky to have been born here. We’re not perfect, by any means, and I won’t turn a blind eye to those imperfections. But for today, I’m celebrating that a group of people fought against tyranny from a foreign nation. They stood up for what they believed in and most died doing so. I celebrate that this country can come together in a time of need and show love and peace when called for.

I’m proud to be an American.

Pay It Forward Retreat- 2015

Have you ever been surrounded by a group of people who shared the same goals and dreams as you? At least once in your life, you need to.

I had the privilege of meeting some amazing people at the Pay It Forward Indie Author Retreat in Charlotte, North Carolina. It was hosted by Danielle Allen and Kendall Gray, two amazing indie authors that are not only talented, but hilarious and fun too.

I met my friend and writing partner Jules Dixon and roomed with the anti-romantic, awesome F. Bradshaw .

I *stalked* Stacy Kestwick (author of Wet– Loved it!) and had the best dinner conversation about piercings with Eric R. Asher. I’m telling you, it was the best weekend!

And not only because there was booze involved (although that did add to the fun). No, how I felt leaving Sunday afternoon changed me. I learned so much to help launch Playing House. I left invigorated and confident in my work, which I’ll admit, I hadn’t been feeling so much.

It was exactly the push I needed to get those final revisions done. Within that week, I had Playing House sent off to my editor and we set the official release date (Sept. 1st!!!!)

Life is good, people. Life. Is. Good